The smell of his body

If you follow my Twitter stream on a regular basis you might recall that weeks ago, i got drenched in the rain--to the bone.. got my camera and phone and other paraphernalia wet too..not to mention the boots and what not.. I could have easily found refuge in a building just as the rain began to pour, but i kept moving on, partly because it had been so long since i got wet in the rain and I like getting wet in the rain.
Anyways, I came back home and within an hour had to go out again..NO time to dry off my stuff and my favorite coat was wet to the core.. So, i decided to dry it out by ironing it.
I think the coat was of a synthetic waterproof material-something that would melt if i put the hot iron right on top of it..So, I used newspaper between the Hot iron and the overcoat and kept ironing it..It was probably the chemicals in the newsprint but a strange smell of print admixed with wet coat and smell of rain and all that finally reminded of a strange smell that came back from distant memory.My ex boyfriend...hmmmmmm...His body..that smell....I guess, he used to accumulate all the automobile exhaust smell on his body -It can happen when you ride a bike  in the open exposing yourself to automobile exhaust on the streets.
We used to have a fixed time of roughly an hour at my home each day to speak and spend time with each other.He would brave all kindsa weather to make it there in time ..and since there was only a hour(this one hour was besides the eight hours we spent together at med school-that is like 9 hours together,geez)
anyways, in that one hour at home, we would get down to business(if you know what i mean) like clockwork..and his body sweat, the automobile exhaust and sometimes the wet coat smell that lingered on his skin ..that smell.. that is how the present smell smelled of..funny how smells get forever etched in our minds like this.. It was a spooky experience to smell that smell again. all while ironing out a wet overcoat.LOL

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I just realized that a lot of young impressionable minds are reading my blog entries and thus i felt the need to come here and add a post script to this story .
Original blog entry was written on Nov 25 2009
Post script has been added on Dec 24th 2009
How many hours are there in a day? 24 , yeah? Then we sleep for 8 and that leaves us with how many?16.
Out of those 16 hours, we were spending 9 hours together..and the med schoool and 1 hour of to and fro travelling.. that leaves us with how much of time for ourselves?
Let us see, 5 hours ..and in those 5 hours, we had to study, shower, eat and do whatever other stuff.
Is that enough? Is that enough time for ourselves?
Also doing such a thing(getting down to business)  at a  prescribed time like clockwork each day, coz we only get  that one hour together at home in full privacy ..again..How healthy was that?
On retrospect, doing it like that coz that was our only chance to do it. was unhealthy in itself..
                          It is like eating and stuffing yourself silly coz you may not get time to eat  when you actually get hungry..it is sad and unnecessary .
                        It was more like an obligation which we felt the need to do coz if we didn't do it at the time we had together,we  won't get time later when we actually miss each other and feel the need to do it.
                                  And yeah, did I mention  the pathetic all nighter phone calls we used to make each other ..all coz i would feel that those one hour sessions ended abruptly just when i started to emote..(I need alteast a 3 hour session, to do it slowly.I can't hurriedly do it like it was my job and i was getting paid for it or some such)
                          So i used to feel that these sessions  were animated and forced and were not done sponteneously and i had to emote and express during that prescribed time of one hour out of force and that doesn't ever happen with me. I need 3 hours...I need it to escalate , slow and steady.(btw, if any creeps are reading this....if you are over the age of 44.please imagine your daughter is writing this blog entry and move on...instead of having creepy fantasies in your head)
                                         When i look back , I understand how distressed I was with the whole scenario.
On top of that,this particular person that i was with., I really didn't want to be with him at all in the first place. It was because he tried every tact in the book so that he could make me be with him, I finally gave in.
Giving in like that,out of the fact that the other person is so into you and that if you are with such a person you are doing something for them..is a VERY BAD IDEA..
                                     nuff of preaching..btw,, to read more on relationship dynamics and such, you might want to check out my other blog "antidote to anger" look to your right and there is  a link.
cheers