THE IOWAN FARMER BOY

THE IOWAN FARMER BOY

poem copyright Dr.A.R aka LECINQBLOG.

All the poems I write are first drafts,straight from my brain to the keyboard to the blog.

My poem writing exercises are basically an unburdening effort,mostly of my thoughts or emotions.

I don't make a special effort to rhyme mainly because i want everybody to enjoy the ideas i am trying to exude and most of the times, too much effort to rhyme makes you lose out on the idea you want to express in all its purity.

I can EASILY write poems that rhyme and sometimes i go OUT OF MY WAY to write lines that don't rhyme.Because thoughts and ideas matter most, even more than silly rhymes.

THE IOWAN FARMER BOY

Tall and lissome,

calm and together,

walking along soybean fields during harvest season,

helping out family you say,

dark hair,curly and frizzy,

sweat on your brow and eyes so bright,

as you stare at the sun and make plans for your life.

my tall iowan boy-man,

plans and plans, 

many you made,

dreams many a dream you saw,

calm and composed,

you glide through life,

handsome and fetching,

offering to do my heavy lifting for me,

and then i politely refuse.

my simpleton iowan farmer,

smart and intelligent,

slow and steady,

always a kind word,

coz your mama said,

"don't say anything if you have nothing nice to say",

spreading yourself too thin,

meeting up family as you travel,

and then,

on some days you wonder what happened to me.

The curled up lower lip,

and neavi all over your supple body,

like stars in the night sky,

you call me "very pretty" 

and then quickly add,

"but you know that about yourself"

and there is a cute awkward pause after that.

my iowan boy man,

building things,breaking apart things,

engineer and scientist,

and yet a farmer boy at heart,

a formidable combination this,

everything i once wanted,

you once had.

my dear iowan man,

I once wanted me to feel loved by you,

i waited and waited for a decade,

and finally one day,

when you tell me ,

"i possibly might have feelings for you".

I quickly stop you and say, 

" and those feelings i am very afraid of"

My sweet ,sexy iowan man,

you once were perfect for me,

we were perfect for each other once,

but now,

it is all changed,

and it hurts me to know that,

and be aware of that change each day.

Tags: #mr_purple, #love, #childhood_love, #childhood_sweetheart, #longing, #waiting, #yearning, #memories, #iowa , #handsome_iowan_farmer_boys , #engineer #fond_memories, #nostalgia

100% uninterested

I ,hereby ,with a whole heart and a confirmed nod can say that i
REALLY REALLY AM NOT interested in any of the men I once wanted in the
past..

None of them seem appealing any more and i have good clear reasons as
to why i don't like them anymore or why they don't appeal to me
anymore
THAT KINDA CLARITY REALLY HELPS ME MOVE ON.

Tags: #love, #unrequited, #moving_on, #ex_boyfriends, #old_friends,
#not_interested

MINE

This Blog article is creative property of Dr.A.R aka LecinQblog.This
blog article originally was written for and is meant to appear ONLY on
any one of the blogs included in this list
http://www.blogger.com/profile/15524952530919224387
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MINE
I want my days to be mine,
my nights to be mine,
my failures to be mine,
my successes to be mine,
my sundays to be mine,
my time to be mine,
my afternoon siestas to be just mine,
my dreams are mine too,
My struggles are mine too,
My life is mine,
I want my life to be just mine for as long as i want it.
my dreams are mine,
My plans are mine,
My love is mine,
my pain in my vaulted heart,
I want that to be just mine too,
not yet ,not yet,
no place for anyone else yet,
it just needs to be all mine,
just for now,
a little more now,
it want it all to be just mine,
My thoughts filled with plans for my life,
and my mind filled with thoughts of my plans alone,
just mine,
just mine,
just mine.
my mistakes to be mine,
my fears to be mine,
my dangers to be mine alone,
my heartbreaks will be secretly mine too,
just mine,
my yearnings mine,
my resentments mine,
my regrets mine,
my sadness mine,
just mine,
only mine,
always just mine,
just yet,
for a little while more,
it will all be just mine,
My bereavements mine,
My grief only mine,
my feelings all locked up as mine,
mine,
just mine,
just mine.
My health just mine,
My ailments just mine,
my burdens just mine,
my happiness just mine,
my loneliness just mine too,
just mine,
just mine,
just mine.
I know you want to be part of my life now,
but not yet,
till i feel i want it to be just mine,
then not yet,
not yet,not yet.
my space,
my home,
just mine,
my decisions just mine,
my responsiblities just mine,
my goals just mine too,
just mine,
just mine,
just mine.
my trips just mine,
my meetings just mine,
my essays just mine,
my writings just mine,
just mine,
just mine,
just mine.
My laughter just mine,
my morning kitchen breeze,
just mine too,
my trepidations and exhilarations,
all just mine too,
just mine,
just mine,
just mine,
My obstacles just mine,
my dilemmas just mine,
my conflicts just mine,
my anger just mine too,
just mine,
just mine,
just mine.
my enchantments are all mine,
my childish wonder and glee all mine too,
I don't want to share just yet,
all just mine,for me,for me,
just mine.
my daydreaming just mine,
my morning yoga just mine,
my kitchen dances just mine,
my nightly orgasms also mine,
My learning sessions mine,
my jamming sessions all mine too,
no space for you yet,
no space for anyone yet,
just mine,
all mine,
just mine.
My twilight sunset viewing just for me,
My morning dawn pictures all mine too,
just mine,
my rides around the lake just mine,
for a little bit more,
I need my time,
my space and my solitude,
just mine,
just mine,
bird watching just mine,
counting parrots and eagles also just mine,
my time just mine,
My heart and my soul,
just mine,
for me and for me,
just for me,
just mine,
just mine,
just mine.
My surgeries just mine,
my patients loving me like a godess also mine,
My accolades all mine,
My praises and adoration all just mine,
just yet,only mine,
for a little bit more,
my alone time just mine,
my ruminations just mine too,
my paintings are mine,
my sketches are just mine too,
my baskets and night lamps,all mine too,
my books and languages,all mine,
my tears and my acne,
all privately mine just yet,
just mine,
just mine,
just mine.
my long showers and my flossing sessions,
my shopping trips and my mirror monologues,
all mine,
just mine,
just yet,
just mine.
my grey hair also mine,
my ageing body also mine,
my monthly periods just mine,
my nightly rest also mine,
my alone time definitely just mine,
just yet,
just mine,
just mine.
my craziness just mine,
my idiosyncracies all mine too,
my magnanimous plans for the world,
they are mine too,
making them all true,
that is definitely just mine.
just mine,
just mine,
just mine.
My travels alone,
all mine,
just mine,
just mine,
just mine.
let me be, with what is just mine,
my documentaries just mine,
my movie plans all mine,
my book manuscripts mine,
my coffee table books,
they are mine too,
cooks books and cookery shows,
all just mine ,
just yet,
can't let anyone in,
my mind,
all mine,

waxing and waning

my attraction for him is waxing and waning and waxing and waning.
honestly?
I know he is not right for me..
and yet,honestly? in a free world I JUST WANT TO GIVE IN and just f*ck
him already..like, f*ck him mindlessly each day , each night in the
car, in the woods, in his room, in my house, out backpacking..all
day,everyday, till finally, the novelty of the sex fades away and then
we can REALLY REALLY REALIZE WE ARE NOT COMPATIBLE and then, we can
move on, having gotten it out of our systems..

Tags: #waxing_and_waning, #sexuality, #lust, #sexual_desire,
#mr_perfect_boy,#getting_it_out_of_my_system

freebies

you don't love me.
I am just far too pretty,
far too smart
and far too kind
and far too giving
and far too funny,
for you to resist me ,
or so no to me,
especially when you are needy right now!
who says no to freebies, right?

'able

'Able
there is something
about his energy
his demeanour
the way he does things
and says things
that is so sweet
and agreeable
and kissable
and fuckable
and marryable
and lovable
and cohabitable
and keepable
and wantable
and foreverable

gook by dr.A.R aka lecinqblog

the worm can

i wanted to just BE IN A STATE OF "IGNORANCE IS BLISS"

like ,when you already know a can is full of worms, YOU DON'T OPEN IT ALL ALL,

just walk around with that can of worms,pretending there is good food inside ,

like,that "worm can" has potential,

this fake hope of a potential

and this hope that will get broken if you open it and find only worms in it?

ruin my time

you will say anything
and do anything
to tide a temporary crisis
and after those five minutes
nothing means anything to you
you move on so easily.
SO IT IS UP TO ME,
to protect myself,
be careful
and be careful about every single step i take and do,
coz, to me,
every small thing means something,
i take everything seriously
and i don't move on for YEARS.
i am getting older
and i have fewer years left to achieve anything.
I CAN'T LET YOU RUIN MY TIME.

feeding off of each other

DON'T YOU understand?
I seduced you with my words,
i seduced you with my love,
i seduced you while you were lonely
and wanting and yearning.

I tapped into your needs
to feed my own innate yearning needs
from yesteryears.

this is what they call FEEDING OFF EACH OTHER.

callous

you don't do that to someone you love.
you are able to do this to me ,
because you don't love me.

would you ever do that to g?
never?why ?
coz you love her.

with me?you are spontaneously so callous ,
because subconsciously you acknowledge,
that since you don't really really love me from the bottom of your heart,
YOU DONT OWE me that kind of arduous love ,
that i truly deserve to have,
for the diamond of a person that i am.

SO,STOP MAKING ME FEEL LIKE SHIT,
just coz you have nothing else to offer.GO AWAY!

a choice

exactly,
I KNOW that i am seducing you .
and I am aware that i AM DOING THAT..
which is why,
IT MAKES ME FEEL CHEAP
doing that to you.

because you are so vulnerable right now.

I WANT SOMEONE IN THEIR RIGHT MIND to choose me,
I DON'T WANT SOMEone to think they are in love with me
because i am being nice to them while they are lonely and vulnerable.

i want you to be in YOUR RIGHT MIND ;
with all your many choices laid out in front of you;
and YET WANT TO CHOOSE ME ,
coz i am so right for you,
coz WE ARE SO RIGHT FOR EACH OTHER
and on that day,
I WILL SAY YES...

and also,
I MUST ;
INSPITE OF ALL MY CHOICES LAID OUT IN FRONT OF ME;
choose you ;
and if i do,
THEN THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME..

coz,
now after ten years,
IF I CHOOSE YOU,
after what you did,
THAT IS IN ITSELF AN EMOTIONAL COMPROMISE
and that explains the tears each day.

IT IS MY MIND TELLING ME THE TRUTH OF ALL THIS is not what i deserve
i deserve better and there is one lifetime to get what i deserve.

verbal seduction

I know i am seducing you with my words
and you are hopelessly falling in love with me.

I KNOW MY WORDS HAVE THAT POWER
which is also why i didnt want to use that power knowingly
coz it makes me feel guilty..
like i am a manipulator...
and i don't want to be a manipulator..
WHICH IS ALSO WHY,
i shall stop talking to you
and no more of those love filled deep impact words
i always have up my sleeve.,
.altleast, NONE FOR YOU ANYMORE.

upset

I am upset ,
don't you understand?
I am upset that someone else did this to you
and you let them play you like a puppet
coz you loved them so much.

I AM UPSET
that this little person had so much of power on you.

I am upset,
you loved someone else so much.

I AM VERY UPSET RIGHT NOW.
I AM HATING ALL THIS.

i am hating this knowledge of what happened these ten years.
i am hating it all.
I AM HATING THIS!

PLATES AND DISHES

This Blog article is creative property of Dr.A.R aka LecinQblog.This blog article originally was written for and is meant to appear ONLY on any one of the blogs included in this list

http://www.blogger.com/profile/15524952530919224387 .If you find this blog article anywhere other than on BLOGSPOT,please visit my original blog,find my email address and email me with details of where else you read this blog entry.All my blogs are AD-free blogs AND I completely frown upon someone else trying to make money off my blogs without my prior written permission.

If you are going to steal IDEAS from my blogs or tweets,please atleast have the decency to ask first, or give credit after asking first or pay royalty money or hire me as writer,executive chef,researcher,executive advisor on board,expert advisor,executive producer,creative director,writer or artist or any other befitting job description.

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PLATES AND DISHES

your plate is full,

My plate is full too,

Let us clear up our own plates,

lick them clean,

soap them up ,

and wash them clean,

then come back to the table,

with cleaner plates,

equally shiny ,

equally new slates,

let us bring something similar,

to the table of our love,

our love,

our love,

our love,

then on,

we have dinners together,

each night over chatter,

on our plates,

and then we do our dishes together,

amidst chatter and love,

our love ,

our love ,

our love.

So,let us clear up our plates,

and wash up our dishes,

for this fresh new start,

in our kitchen,

on our table,

with our clean plates.

POEM BY DR.A.R aka lecinqblog

==========================

tAGS: mr_purple, old_love, new_start ,dormant_goes_active, love,sweet_love,dearest

hungry for me now,but what about yesterday?

I see that you are hungry for me now.
You are sitting up ;
and paying attention to me now.
but,ten years ago,
i wanted you to ,
but you said,
"it was water under the bridge"!

Too quick to depart ,you were,
too quick to walk way,
too quick ,too quick!

You have all the time in the world now,
to sit and wait for me,
and I have none ,
to let you in my world now.

Times change,tables turn,
You can afford now what I can't afford,
time for each other.
role reversal?
maybe yes,maybe not!

Impatient and smart
my sweet little pure soul you were.
You were pure and desirable then.

You were pure,
and pure and pure,
and I wanted you then.

Now,you are used,
and abused and damaged,
I don't want you now ;
like I wanted you back then.

And,you want me now ,
like you possibly never wanted before,
I can't have you like you want me to,
but I am forever your friend.

TAgs:Mr_purple,rekindling,Old_love,love_lost,Love_from_long_ago,reconnection,youngin_love,sweet_pureness

MOST READ BLOG ENTRIES FROM MY BLOG http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/ in the past year

Here is a list of my top TEN most visited blogs on my poetry and poise blog.

There are many more blogs entries which are widely visited as well,but I am just keeping the list short and mentioning the top ten entries.

These are stats relevant to only the past year!Also ,this top ten list DOESN'T include the various blogs that have gotten tens of thousands of google plus shares in the past week.

 

I write  #poetry, #lyrical_prose   various stories about #life_memories   #romance #lust #life on my poetry and poise blog.

here goes

1. Revisiting a Four year old ghost-poetic rendition ... Nov 15, 2012 http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2012/11/revisiting-four-year-old-ghost-poetic.html
2. The gossamer strings of silver Jan 4, 2010 http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2010/01/gossamer-strings-of-silver.html
3. A special HI! to MJD Jul 28, 2009 http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2009/07/special-hi-to-mjd.html
4. Accidental crossposting Mar 27, 2009 http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2009/03/accidental-crossposting.html
5. My locks of Hair--how I chop them often ! Mar 23, 2009 http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2009/03/my-locks-of-hair-how-i-chop-them-often.html
6. Gnarls Barkley and jamiroquai,umberella and Elvis... Jul 31, 2008 http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2009/03/high-risk-pregnancies.html
7. High risk pregnancies ! Mar 18, 2009 http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2009/05/loving-two-people-at-same-time-two.html
8. Loving two people at the same time-Two timing? May 5, 2009
9. A fleeting love in february ! Mar 7, 2013 http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2013/03/a-fleeting-love-in-february.html
10. How to make geeky earrings from paper clips-step b... May 7, 2010 http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2010/05/how-to-make-geeky-earrings-from-paper.html

Blog entries from my poetry and poise blog that are doing the google PLUS rounds

Here is a list of my poetry and poise blogs that are getting tens of
thousands of hits on google plus
http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2010/03/i-dont-care-about-money.html
http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2010/03/i-wanted-to-stand-back-and-watch.html
http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2010/02/visual-art-twitter-profile-pic-and-page.html
http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2010/01/standing-alone-left-to-wonder.html
http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2009/11/far-north-movie-review.html
http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2009/08/review-of-mjs-funeral-memorial-service.html
http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2009/04/shampoo-so-sweet-smelling-you-want-to.html
http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2011/03/creation-movie-review.html
http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2010/12/letting-doves-fly-away-one-by-one.html
http://poetry-and-poise.blogspot.com/2010/12/breach-of-trust.html

A whopping sixty THOUSAND and eight hundred odd people have google PLUSEd my poetry and poise blog in two days!how?

In the past two days something CURIOUS has happened.
A whopping SIXTY thousand eight hundred and forty eight people have
google plused my
POETRY AND POISE BLOG.
whoa!
GOOGLE kept asking me to join google plus and I have NOT joined so far.
so,I really wonder how my blogs are actually visible on the google
plus network enabling people to GOOGLE PLUS them!
Is my poetry and poise blog being featured on google plus?
What is happening?
baffled,surprised and honored all at the same time.
thanks to all google plus members who have read,liked and google
plused various blog entries of mine!
HONORED .
I do write six different blogs,and you can read all of them here
http://www.blogger.com/profile/15524952530919224387
I also tweet here
twitter.com/lecinqblog
twitter.com/ypumelfen
You can always say hi to me on twitter or email me even.
hugs and cheers to all readers.

Mr.C,My first ever AUSSIE man CRUSH!

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This Blog article(EXCEPT EXCERPTS) is creative property of Dr.A.R aka LecinQblog.This blog article originally was written for and is meant to appear on any one of the blogs in this list

http://www.blogger.com/profile/15524952530919224387 .If you find this blog article anywhere other than on BLOGSPOT,please visit my original blog,find my email address and email me with details of where else you read this blog entry.All my blogs are AD-free blogs AND I completely frown upon someone else trying to make money off my blogs without my prior written permission.

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Mr.C,

My first ever AUSSIE man CRUSH!

I was so enamored by him that I once wrote a WHOLE BLOG ENTRY describing all the parts of his body that I LOVED!

with pictures of each part to support my attraction...LOL

That was in 2005.

Some of my old readers from my older blog have actually managed to STALK me here on this blog too.They sure remember that blog i wrote about him back then?

speaking of old readers,This one particular stalker alarms me,COZ,they are actually a stalker of mr.u and they stalk me coz they either think I am mr.u OR I am someone closely connected to mr.u..I have to clarify,I AM NEITHER,so move along stalker person,find another target to harrass!

So,yeah,mr.c

I shall call him mr.c,COZ,ofcourse,we can't reveal his name and unnecessarily,appear in search results for his name search.

His first name starts with c,HENCE ,mr.c

So,yeah,if I think long and hard,HE WAS POSSIBLY my first introduction to AUSSIE MEN.

There is this particular white man phenotype,,which often repeats in aussie land...

Maybe,there was a lot of INBREEDING that took place in aussie land,after all the robust convicts were sent off packing from britain to australia and ofcourse, these white convicts STOLE the land from the ABORIGINES,to whom the land originally belonged.Since,skin color and racial segregation was a british idea to maintain SUPREMACY , inbreeding and certain phenotypes being reinforced has happened in their white majority colonies-aussie land and south US.

A LOT OF CRIMES were committed against aborigines,,MUCH LIKE A LOT OF SIMILAR CRIMES that were committed by the british, in every tropical country they chose to invade,"colonize" and PLUNDER thereafter..

anyways,that is for another blog entry,which I shall shortly write and post on my RAMBLE BLOG.

Coming back to mr.c,

HE WAS MY FIRST INTRODUCTION TO AUSSIE MEN.

he also had the typical aussie white man phenotype-TALL,handsomely built,blonde hair.

coming to think of it,my first introduction to AUSSIE MEN was MEL GIBSON.

Again,SEVERE SEXUAL ATTRACTION TO HIS FACIAL TYPE and body type.

see,look what I am saying?WHY ARE AUSSIE MEN SO GOD-DAMN sexually attractive?

The aussie man WORK OUT REGIMEN is more RUGBY BOD style,working out all body parts and hence makes AUSSIE MEN appear more robust and well balanced all round, UNLIKE, the american man work out,where pectorals and arms are worked out in excess and hence the WORKED OUT AMERICAN MEN,look like popeye buffoons,,,DISPROPORTIONATE and imbalanced muscle mass.The american man work out must be modified so that the men DON'T LOOK SO UNNATURALLY BUFF !

hmmm,so,yeah,I first came to know of MR.C, probably in 2003 -2004?yeah,,,so,that was almost ten years ago.

Just like all other men that I have taken a sexual liking to,there is some great attraction to their personality first.

I THINK mr.c has a GREAT BALANCE to his personality.

very good self control,logical thinking,cool problem solving,kindness,sensitivity but not overly imbalanced in being over sensitive,calm and cool,definitely EFFICIENT and skilled and talented and hardworker when it comes to his work.

and very tall,very handsome,well built,great conversational skills, and though I don't particularly like blonde hair,because of him, I started liking blonde for a bit.

Why am I writing this blog entry?

Well,for one,If you are reading my 12day300pages BLOG SERIES on LECINQBLOG.BLOGSPOT.COM,You will already know that I am attempting a PURGE BLOG series on all of my blogs, in an attempt to purge out ALL RESIDUAL MEMORIES out of my head and prepare my head for a fresh start and a more productive life.

This blog entry is also kind of a PURGE BLOG..

purging the memory of mr.c from my head too.

so,yeah,coming back to mr.c.I WAS DEFINITELY IMPRESSED.

Not in a ,"I want to date him " way,,but in a ":it won't be bad if i had to date this kind of guy" way;

Anyways,long story short.

mr.c has never ever disappointed me by doing stupid things,unlike ,say,mr.u.

MR.U has disappointed me so many times from 2005-2013,,that I called it quits and cut off the mental cord attached to him.

MR.C on the other hand has never never done anything wrong or stupid..an epitome of perfection,IN MY OPINION.

SMART,SEXY,COOL.

educated too.Out of all the men i fell for,this one and mr.purple actually did really well in college...

who is mr.purple?

another blog entry coming up about mr.purple too.

Anyways,coming back to mr.c,He never disappointed me for years of having crushed on him,till somewhere in 2008 the crush faded out.

and then I stopped keeping myself informed about what he was up to.

Very recently a few months ago,I looked him up and WAS DISAPPOINTED at what had happened meanwhile.

he had moved to the us, and had dated and impregnated this lady,who he then got engaged to ,had a son and then after having that son,got married.

okay,DISAPPOINTMENT that he impregnanted someone and THEN,married them.

he is the last person i figured would do such an OUT OF CONTROL thing...

don't men know how to use protection?

I JUDGE MEN WHO GET MARRIED TO THE WOMEN WHOM THEY IMPREGNATE.

period!

Mr.c was the last person I thought who would do such a thing.

the calm,smart,cool collected logical thinking man with a lot of self control,went and had a kid and married the kid mama?WHAT?

This the same judgement that made me write this LOOONG BLOG ENTRY, bashing anthony bourdain,who is 60 years old, impregnanted this restaurant employeed italian immigrant lady who is old enough to be his daughter, and then ,after she had their daughter,married this woman.

THAT IS CALLED "settling" my friend!

WHY DO VERY INTELLIGENT MEN get into this UNPLANNED PREGNANCY MESS?

really!

so,yeah,SURELY,mr.c,knew that unprotected sex will lead to a pregnancy,no?

do men stop thinking when it comes to DICK MATTERS?

SO,yeah,i feel like mr.c,settled for less than what he deserved ..

the lady he is now married to is REALLY NOT what I thought was his type to begin with.

not from his work field,not really that smart,not that super beautiful either.

but,with men, there is no telling,,they end up with weird sexual fetishes after watching too much porn and maybe he has a special fetish for women who look like her..or some such.who knows!

NOT TRYING TO BE A JEALOUS GOSSIPY WOMAN BASHING FELLOW WOMEN just coz they married my crush or anything...NOT THAT AT ALL.

I am just NOT IMPRESSED WITH HIS CHOICE.

he has high standards from what i knew of him from 2004,,so,his current choice of wife,doesn't fit my idea of the kind of woman he would settle down with..

hmmmm.

something doesn't fit right!

but again,he is still the calm, collected,confident,efficient person at work.he still continues to be super handsome too...

but I don't know..

just disappointed , is all!

something in this story doesn't sit right with me..I feel bad for him that he settled for less!

Tags: mr_c ,purge_blog, crush, 2004,aussie_man,australia

DISENGAGING FROM THE TANGO

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DISENGAGING FROM THE TANGO

Poem by Dr.A.R aka Lecinqblog

Disengaging from the tiny tango,

is a part of this dance.

Me,the swan ,

gliding on the dance floor,

alone and shiny,

doing my dainty dance,

sometimes strong and acrobatic,

sometimes gentle and delicate,

Me,the swan,

gliding on the dance floor,

as the crowd watches and cheers.

Me,the swan ,gliding on the dance floor,

And as I dance,

I spot you at the fringes,

standing in your dark glow,

The dark feathered man duck,

cute and sweet,

quacking in your tongue,

A cluckety guttural speech,

I glide along dancing,

constantly distracted by you,

standing at the fringes,

quacking away in your deep dark garb.

I constantly look over my shoulder,

slightly distracted from my dance,

I do that so often that I pay note,

Who is this duck in deep dark feathers,

and this pleasant guttural quack?

I gesture to you,

I call you over,

to dance along,

just for a bit,

just for a tiny tango.

I gesture wildly till you take note,

And take note ,you do.

You stop your quacking and take note,

of the pristine bejewelled swan!

She dances and sings these strange notes,

you are bemused by her strange swan tongue!

Notes that sound interesting to your duck ear,

bemused and interested,

you take note,

of the bejewled swan,

gliding along the dance floor.

We are but the same,

me the gliding swan in water,

you the paddling duck in water,

but water birds all the same,

we are both water birds.

I gesture wildly till you take note,

half surprised,

Is it me you are calling?

And then,

in full public view,

You pitter patter your duck feet,

as you eagerly walk across the dance floor,

to join me in a dance.

You reach me,

And we ENGAGE in a tiny tango ,

our kind eyes lock for but a moment,

your kind duck eyes meet my kind swan eyes.

We are but the same,

gliding water birds,

gliding and singing,

water birds we are.

We do our tiny little tango,

shoulder to shoulder,

arms entangled,

feet in rythm,

eyes locked,

we have our tiny little tango.

Then,as we are still doing our tango,

I look over to the fringes where you were standing before,

there they were,

your whole duck family,

mama duck and baby ducks,

looking along,

slightly alarmed at our tiny tango,

slightly troubled,

but yet cheering on.

And ,as we are doing our tiny little tango,

for just a little bit more,

I disengage and retire to the fringes,

without a word to you,

without a gesture,

an abrupt retirement.

You seem nonplussed,

wondering why I stopped,

But I quickly walk away,

into the changing rooms ,

out of your view,

while you stand alone in the dancing arena.

You then slowly walk back to your duck family,

dejected and deep in thought,

invigorated by my dance,

yet surprised by it all,

a new experience,

a different experience.

Upon your return,

mama duck seems relieved,

baby ducks don't know any different,

they quack along at your return.

Many dances pass,

no sign of me on the dance floor,

your tired eyes search for me,

the prinstine swan gliding way.

I am not in view,

I am in the changing rooms,

drinking water,

changing constumes,

recuperating and reassessing.

And finally after a long time,

I reemerge,

strengthened and enlightened by my brief rest.

When I re-emerge on the dance floor,

I am a new me,

And yet,

As I glide along on the dance floor,

My eyes constantly run to you.

I notice your sad face,

yearning for yet another dance,

like the tiny little tango,

that we had not long ago.

So I gesture for you again,

for another tiny little tango.

But,you hesitate this time,

you look at your duck family,

as if to seek their approval and blessing.

They give it half heartedly,

and you pitter patter, yet again,

across the dance floor,

and then we have a tiny little tango,

yet again.

Another new tiny little tango!

This time it isn't as effortless.

I try to keep our bodies from getting closer,

yet trying to teach you the dance,

I try to push you further,

while still holding close.

The effort shows,

The struggle shows,

And for a minute,

you try to learn,

You try to do the tiny little tango.

　

This is a different tiny little tango ,

different from the previous one,

and then,as you try to meet my eyes,

I look away,

I am focusing more on the floor,

And,Your kind eyes moisten.

When I finally look up to meet your eyes,

You look down focusing on the floor.

Our eyes never meet this time.

This is a different tiny little tango,

no spontaneous charm,

no gay abandon,

just lowered eyes and

cautious footsteps.

finally,

you DISENGAGE from this tiny tango,

and walk back to the waiting duck family.

The ducklings are eagerly quacking at your return,

mama duck is relieved you are back in her arms.

and me ,

the pristine swan continues to glide on the dance floor,

as the crowds applaud the finesse of my dance,

my strong moves and my delicate turns,

The gliding swan continues to glide on the dance floor.

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Tags: #dilemma #mr_t #friends #comrades #chemistry #sexuality #love_lost #past_love